Modern language? like, It’s, like really annoying?

Charismatic sml

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Womankind

What happened to women?

In 1928 Women won the same voting rights as men. We were becoming equals. Now we can argue back, go out to the pub, have sex with men we don’t know, have kids out of wedlock. We can ask the man (If we have one, as it’s fine if we don’t) to cook dinner, to put the washing out, even to change a nappy. So that means we must have total equality..

The other day my daughter asked me if she could have her hair dyed blond. She is 5, and has lovely dark curly hair. ‘Actually, I want it straight as well’ she added. She will not wear trousers. She likes me to wear dresses. She thinks that if I am to sing a song that it should sound like a princess voice. If I sing a song that is not in a princess voice (I was singing ‘shit list’ from natural born killers at the time) she protests with something like ‘yuk. Stop that’. Disney has a lot to answer for, but that’s another story.

I feel very confused by all this. We have so much freedom, but only as long as we look great, have MILF appeal, and don’t get me started on the term ‘Yummy Mummy’. As I do my work, the stew is cooking, the washing machine is running, the bedroom is a tip, the baby is un-well, I have friends coming to dinner this evening, and haven’t even thought of dessert yet. I have 2 hours to do all this before I pick up my eldest  and most severe (affore mentioned) critic from school. Then I need to feed them, bath them, play with them – as any good mother should, not forgetting TV is bad for their development-, get them ready for bed, do homework and read a story, tidy the house (again) finish off dinner have a shower, and I bet you, any money, just as the guests are due to arrive and I look a little tired, and still have my apron on and my ‘bald face’ as my mother used to call it when she didn’t have time to apply make up, my boyfriend will say to me “Come on babe, make a bit more effort with your appearence..Surely you can find time to put on some lipstick?”

Lets raise a glass to the modern mother shall we? Oh and by the way, research suggests we drink too much alcohol. How strange.

Good Woman '50's

Good Woman 2000's

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How I Annoyed The Trendy Girl in the Bike Shop

trendy 1Trendy people hate the word Trendy, because the word Trendy is NOT trendy.

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Women: What happened since we got the vote..

 

 

 

evolution of feminismWe are SO much more shaggable since we got the vote..and also quite sweet, and placid, and slim, and blond…

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Jamie Bateson’s Bollock – a new school rumour from Mike Murphy

Jamie Bateson bollock

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A happy-looking application of suntan lotion

I loved how happy these two looked on the beach today

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Mrs Anderson from Sara Maxted

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Ebay: The Bell Bottom Blunder

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The Independent shoot

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2.4 Hours in KFC

Based on the saying “If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you always got” I spent part of my day sitting in KFC today drawing people on my iPad. Neither of which I have ever done before. I now have indigestion and tired eyes, so it’s definately true.

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